Hollywood Got A Clue, And They’ll Get Another

Hasbro has made it known recently that they are completely unfulfilled with just selling toys and board games. I guess they’re hurting like everyone else, unable to get their net income out of the low hundreds of millions.

To beef up the income statement, they’re making movies out of every damn property they’ve got, be it a game for babies or some random damn toy. Monopoly, Candy Land, Stretch-Friggin-Armstrong. Really, there are no depths they won’t plumb.

But for some reason, some shitass fucking reason, that’s not good enough. They can’t just pick some game off the shelf, throw it on the table and call it good. Nooooo. They’ve got to go after the one, THE LONE, SINGLE BOARD GAME MOVIE THAT ALREADY EXISTS [...]

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